NEWS: Area Man Rather Satisfied with Silver REQ Pack’s Contents


Whistling as he examined his REQ collection like fine wine, long-time Halo fan Lawrence Mattie, 27, whose gamertag is “xC0RRUPT0Rx” reportedly claimed to be “rather satisfied” with the contents of a Silver REQ Pack he had just opened in Halo 5: Guardians.

“I had just finished a couple of games of Warzone, and managed to win both games, so I was feeling pretty good about myself. I decided to buy a Silver REQ Pack with 5000 of my 5627 REQ points,” Mattie described to HaloSwallower the circumstances which led him to buy the Silver REQ Pack. “It took longer than usual for some reason, probably due to my slightly slow Internet connection, and when it finally opened, well, I wasn’t jumping for joy, but let’s just say I wasn’t sighing in disappointment either.”

According to Mattie, the Silver REQ Pack gave him a Corp Scorpion certification, which he called “pretty cool” and the Shove It assassination, which he called “really sick”. The SR32 Platinum player, who is said to enjoy rapidly switching between various weapon skins while waiting for games to load, also received an Uncommon Warzone RP Boost, a couple of Scout Warthogs and some Needlers and SAWs from the same REQ Pack.

“It’s actually not that bad, really. I remember I opened another Silver REQ Pack not too long ago, and received the Fade weapon skin for the Magnum, as well as the Plasma Pistol Certification, which wasn’t really as cool as I had hoped at the time, so yeah, this REQ Pack exceeded my expectations in more ways than one.”

“Sure, I once opened a Silver Pack that gave me a DMR with an Energy Bayonet, as well as the Beam Rifle Certification, plus there were some Sword Ghosts, Hailstorms and Tundra Gungooses thrown in there too. It was obviously much better than this REQ Pack I just opened, but hey, I’ll take it over Mongoose baseball cards any day.”

Suddenly, the HaloSwallower crew heard screaming and shouting coming from another room, and proceeded to investigate. We found that Mattie’s roommate, who declined to be named so as to not disgrace his Spartan Company, had just bought 10 Gold REQ Packs with real money, only to unlock several variants of the Athlon helmet and armor.

“This is just fucking bullshit, 343, god damn it I demand a full refund!” he shouted while thrashing his Xbox One controller.

“See? I told you it was a decent REQ Pack,” Mattie said in response to this interesting development. “Now, if you don’t mind, I need to start grinding for Achilles armor and using some of my RP Boosts so I can buy more REQ Packs.”

Sources told HaloSwallower that Mattie then went into a Warzone game on Battle of Noctus, only to have his happy mood take a 180-degree turn when his Corp Scorpion got spawn-boarded. Mattie then reportedly went on a Kylo Ren fit of rage, thrashing everything in and around his house.



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