NEWS: Humble Covenant Zealot Credits Promotion Entirely To UNSC


Insisting that he was just an extremely lucky but otherwise ordinary Sangheili, the recently-appointed Zealot Myle ‘Yajasee attributed his swift rise through the ranks of the Covenant entirely to the UNSC.

“While I’d like to believe that I was promoted to Zealot due to my own skill and tenacity, I know that the true reason why is because of the UNSC. If the humans at the Absolute Record hadn’t caused Jul ‘Mdama to trigger the Custodian to remove the platform under all those faithful Zealots, there wouldn’t have been so many open slots for the position of Zealot for me to fill,” ‘Yajasee said in a video call interview, admitting that despite his impressive leadership in destroying numerous Swords of Sanghelios supply depots, the UNSC ought to claim 99.999% of the credit.

“Sure, I fought valiantly during the First and Second Battles of Requiem, and maybe brutally murdered a SPARTAN-IV or two, but if Fireteam Osiris and Blue Team hadn’t destroyed Jul ‘Mdama’s finest forces and the massive Covenant fleet around the Argent Moon respectively, all those positions wouldn’t have been made available to me. The Covenant has so many brilliant tacticians, skilled swordsmen and natural leaders that it wouldn’t have been possible for me, who is just alright at everything, to ever become anything higher than a Commander.”

‘Yajasee’s other notable achievements include leading Banshee Raiders to protect a Kraken, as well as mobilizing 47 Suicide Grunts to destroy 60 Promethean Soldiers boxed up in a cave. His magnum opus, however, was when he used stolen HAVOK nukes to destroy three CRS-class light cruisers belonging to the Swords of Sanghelios in 2555.

HaloSwallower would like to add that, at the end of the interview, ‘Yajasee became agitated at us when he learnt that he would not be paid for doing the interview. He then threatened to unleash a bioweapon (the same one used on Sedra in Halo: Nightfall) on our non-existent headquarters before being killed by Spartan Jameson Locke with the Noob Combo during the Battle of Sunaion.


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