THEORY: Is The Master Chief Actually John Cena?

Perhaps the one of the most intense unanswered questions regarding the story of Halo is the actual surname of the Master Chief, Spartan John-117. We know he’s from Eradinus II, we know he’s in his forties, we know what his face looks like, and yet…

We have not the foggiest as to what his surname is.

This is certainly a gray question for Halo. Many fans may be in outrage over their precious “player avatar” icon of the Chief being compromised if his surname is revealed, and not to mention, some would be stifled by 343 Industries simply pulling a name out of a hat. Yes, a random name would be kind of off-putting, not particularly memorable, and perhaps even anticlimactic.

And it is for that reason that the Master Chief’s true identity is WWE champion John Cena.

Look at the similarities between the Chief and Cena:

  • Chief and Cena both start with the same letter.
  • Master Chief and John Cena both have the same first-name.
  • The Master Chief is a genetically augmented super-soldier, John Cena is a superhuman WWE wrestler.
  • Shrek is love, Shrek is life.

And yet, it goes further than that. In Halo: The Fall of Reach, a character-defining part of the Chief’s transition to a six year-old boy to a Spartan II was when he took on five adult ODST’s in a boxing ring. He was 14 at the time, and successfully wiped out the ODST’s in a matter of five seconds, killing two of them. That’s very, very similar to how John Cena steamrolls his foes in the WWE wrestling matches.

HaloSwallower apologizes for the existence of that video

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