THEORY: Did Halsey Smuggle Some Augmentations For Her Own?

The Spartan-II project may be the most morally ambiguous action ever taken by the United Nations Space Command during the twenty sixth century. Initially, it was the halt a rapidly growing insurrection caused by a ton of Outer Colony farmers who are too lazy to blah blah blah blah or anything that the UEG Republicans expect them to do (even though most expectations simply cannot be achieved by people who are driven to poverty and neglected and ignored by their government). However, when the Covenant invaded, the purpose of the Spartans soon shifted. Instead of crushing the souls and dreams of Outer Colony children and making them stay hydrated off their own tears and dig the graves of their now murdered parents with their own calloused and blistered fingers (holy Precursors that’s fucked up), the Spartans were all that stood between the obviously immaculate human race and certain extinction.

Anyway, after a 27 year war, the Spartan-II’s are basically the reason humanity still exists. Now, let’s look at he creator of the pr0gr4m, Catherine Halsey.

Halsey is the most powerful one-armed woman to have ever existed. Not only was she the mastermind behind the Spartan-II program, but she survived some of the most horrifying battles during the Human-Covenant War. The Fall Of Reach, the Battle of Onyx, just to name a few. As of September of 2558, Halsey is in-league with a Sangheili warlord named Jul ‘Mdama—leader of the most dangerous Covenant remnant faction, and that one guy who had all dem Knights. It was in September 2558 that during their alliance, Jul grew suddenly angry and basically threw Halsey against a wall as hard as he could.

This is the kind of thing that should have turned Halsey into a beanbag. However, Halsey was completely fine in the exact next panel of the comic book this happened in. It was like nothing happened (like when Ted Cruz continues his legacy of being a complete and utter dumbbass, but has no trouble being reelected for some absurdly gerrymandered reason). This does not make sense. Halsey should not have been completely fine after being thrown like that.

And this isn’t the only time Halsey has shown Superman-level durability. In Halo: Glasslands, Spartan-III Lucy-B091 punched Halsey in the arm after Halsey threatened to harm a Huragok that Lucy had befriended. This was not only the first time Lucy had spoken since being diagnosed with post-traumatic vocal disarticulation (which really was beautiful development for Lucy), but also made absolutely zero sense because Halsey very much unharmed from it. Like a Spartan-II, when a Spartan-III punches you, you don’t get up and just walk away. No, Halsey’s arm should have been shattered from that person punch (so THAT’S why Jul cut it off!!!).

Basically, we now have two instances in which Halsey walked away from expectedly destructive attacks without even a wobble. We can hereby conclude that during her work on the Spartan-II project, she used some of the augmentations on herself.

See? Now Traviss’s hate boner against Halsey makes a remote amount of sense!

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